WiCR

Women in Community Rail

Building Self- Confidence

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                            Delivered by trainer Rachel Gillett

As with all Rachel’s sessions, this one was fast-paced, thought-provoking and interactive.

The aim was to learn techniques and strategies to build up our self-confidence, and to develop ways of putting them into practice.

Working in pairs in breakout rooms, we focussed on specific questions.

In the first three we considered:

1) What is self-confidence? What would I like to deal with more confidently?

2) In what situations DO I feel confident?

3) What issues around lack of confidence do I want to tackle?

In the final breakout session, we described a situation which we hadn’t handled confidently, and discussed ways we might do better in future.

Skills, attitudes, and behaviours

We were reminded that:

1) Recognising the many skills, we already have is a big step on the road to self-confidence. It’s important to know and build on our strengths.

2) Being assertive is NOT the same as being aggressive!

Assertiveness requires self-respect and respect for the other person.

  We should:

 Say clearly and directly what we mean and what our expectations are, while being prepared to negotiate a compromise.

 Accept the other person’s right to say ‘No’ but spell out the consequences of refusal.

  Be aware of the need for appropriate body language, tone of voice and eye contact.

  Overcoming Avoidance

  Lack of confidence can be the reason we try to avoid challenging situations.

 We need to identify:

       What is the task?

       What are we afraid of?

      What are the possible consequences of avoidance?

       What are the benefits of managing to do it?

       What would be our first step?

And, as ever, we shouldn’t be afraid to ask for help and support.

A Solutions Based Approach

Scaling can help to assess a current situation and measure progress, which can boost confidence in achieving goals.

Questions to ask ourselves:

  What needs to be achieved?

          On a scale of 0 to 10 where are we now?

          Why do we feel we are at that point?

          What would be the next small step up the scale?

          What needs to be done to get to that next step?

 Building a Toolkit

Acting AS IF we’re confident can lead to feeling confident.

We SHOULD try to take risks and extend our comfort zone. (And we can take it as slowly as we need.) We SHOULDN’T be afraid to say when we don’t know. We don’t have all the answers.

Remember…Resilience isn’t just coping. It’s the ability to bounce back!

Confidence Building-your-self-confidenceDownload

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